by supportadmin_418 | Mar 6, 2019 | Gratitude List
1. mantras that bring things back into perspective, “ah-ha” moments and knowing that things will happen when the time is right.
2. having the patience to wait for the right time
3. my husband, when I can relax and enjoy him
4. the blissful dead-tired feeling that comes from having physically labored all day
5. the anticipation of collapsing into bed for a well-deserved night’s rest
6. clean windows
7. the “before and after”
8. green, flora and fauna in a million different shades
by supportadmin_418 | Mar 6, 2019 | Gratitude List
Grateful for:
1. for my homemade expresso/whipping cream iced drink
2. for living in the moment when I can do it
3. for all that I love about my husband
4. that I can see the good in him even as I am angry with him
5. for the lightening of the burden that happens when I share it
6. for Carol for insisting that I share when I don’t feel the need to
7. that I feel fine most of the time, even while I am struggling
8. that so many things make me smile when I’m paying attention
9. for my puppy, Harry, who makes me smile every day just by being himself.
10. for all the opportunities for discovery and growth that God provides for me.
11. for the great break a gratitude list provides when the juices aren’t quite flowing.
by supportadmin_418 | Mar 6, 2019 | Gratitude List
I’m Grateful for:
1. Coffee with my bunky this morning at Starbucks. A better way to start the day than snoozing through the alarm for an hour and racing to work
2. giving myself a break for not working as much as I should this week. some weeks I work more, some less. rain-induced inertia and boredom.
3. workouts with a friend, time to connect, how good my body feels, and how much less space my body takes up in my head
4. the tree outside my bathroom window. First, it had purple flowers, then huge broad heart-shaped bright green leaves, and also little seedpods hanging for the branches. In the pacific northwest, the trees only have leaves for the most part. All this embellishment is cool.
5. The Tom Stoppard play ‘Arcadia’ that I just read. very clever.
6. I get to have a slumber party with my favorite person every night.
7. knowing that when someone is in a bad mood, she will feel better soon. it’s only a matter of time. I know this from years of experience–it always passes. always.
by supportadmin_418 | Mar 6, 2019 | Gratitude List
What I’m grateful for:
1) Hearing stones Roses “I wanna be adored” (to which I shouted out “Hell yeah”), Pearl Jam’s “Black” (I know that’s super un-cool, but lets hear it for ’92!), and Hearts’ “Barracuda” (oohch-a) all on the way to work, assuring that it just may be a good day despite the rain.
2) The insanely well-timed package of candy from a lunatic in London. I should say this has so far been the highlight of my week.
3) My super bitchin’ new friend who has made me fear new people less.
4) That I don’t have to make money as a photographer anymore and I can say no to photo jobs and actually stand a chance of enjoying making art again.
5) Even though my Mom is coming to town this weekend, I have a plan and prayers in place to center me so I can get through it.
6) Watching Molly poop this morning- she is so cute the way she rounds into a ball that I always want to pet her while she poops (which annoys her so I don’t).
7) That I don’t have to poop in the rain.
by supportadmin_418 | Mar 6, 2019 | Recognizing Growth
I work to notice when I am talking negatively to myself. It is more insidious than I think. I practice recognizing it from tension and anxiety and then turning softer and gentler in self-criticism. I think that it is improving and then I have my subconscious mind show up in a dream in that time between initially waking up in the early, early morning and waking up to start my day an hour or so later. Those dreams are usually ones I can remember because of the time of sleep cycle and also because of the time of sleep cycle, they are very vivid. They show me the heaviness and thinking that lurks beyond the joy I try to cultivate in my waking hours. When I have an opportunity to consciously practice noticing and controlling the nature of the thoughts I’m entertaining, I tend to admonish myself for the ugliness of dissatisfied thoughts running around in my head. That’s how insidious it is. I realize, in my lucid moments, that I cannot fix it without surrendering control and letting Divine Me work within the Universe to replace fear with love and truth. I am making progress, slow but sure.
